This is a compliment to last weeks message (Understanding men, which I have not been able to get a copy of yet – it seems everyone wants to understand men!) This was a very concise message, with some generalities about women, but the most important things to take away are –
*Women do not need to be fixed, we are made in the image of God, made for a purpose and a reason.
*Running to others to fill your needs, emotions, relationships and need for communication will leave you distraught, emotional and confused. Yes, we need these things, but put God in the void first, then fill with people. People will let you down, God will not.
A women needs connection, she wants to have friends, to talk to them. She wants to plan, to take pictures, make memories. She has a desire for relationships and wants to be connected to others. She can feel distraught when connections fail, when others don’t respond, when she puts her trust in human connections above all else. First, she needs to make a God connection, then connections with others will thrive because she is not demanding that her needs be met by every relationship and connection. Woman was made to complete man, she is his helper; this does not mean she is just a secretary, running errands, making dinner, cleaning the house. She is the ‘ezer’ like Eben-Ezer, the helper that completes, uplifts, strengthens, is a part of a whole, supports and fights for those that she is in relation with. An example is that Eve was made to be Adam’s ‘ezer’, his helper. Another example of a woman wanting that connection and filling it with Jesus is the woman who poured perfume on Jesus before His last days. She desired a connection with Him and Jesus said of her, ‘She did a beautiful thing.’
A woman needs communication, a response. She desires for others to talk and respond to her. She needs to have a response, to know that things are okay, to fill a need in others. She wants to be involved, to give out her gift of empathy and respond in a loving manner. Again, she needs to be in communication with God and His word so that this need can be filled, then she can give the gift of love, joy and peace when others need it. An example is the women that followed Jesus to the cross, they were there to give others support in their time of need. For the women at the tomb who saw an empty grave, an angel and then Jesus risen from the dead, their response was praise and worship. They looked to Jesus to fill their need and they responded.
A woman needs security, not just financial, but emotional and spiritual. She needs to know that things are okay in a relationship, that she doesn’t need to worry. This need for security needs to be met at a basic level by trust in God. When she trusts that God can provide for her, give her the support she needs, the spiritual food that she desires, then she can trust others in a relationship. She can give the gift of providing for the emotions of others and giving out her wisdom and love to those she touches. An example is the widow who gave up her financial security, her last bit to live on, in exchange for the emotional and spiritual security that Jesus offered to her. She knew that she was receiving so much more in the end.
Women are the compliment to men. We are unique, mysterious and yes, confusing. We are the helper, the support, the one who will fight for our relationships when storms come. We want to plan, to dream, to make memories. We want to touch, cry, praise, sing, dance and yell when our relationships are tested. When the winds of life howl and strain to drown out our prayers, we cry out from our souls to the God who made us and ask for wisdom. We want to talk and speak our hurts and dreams and respond to others while making connections. We need to have time with God, a relationship with Him that involves communication – from reading His word and praying, form worship and praise – so that we can rely on Him first. We need to trust Him with our security in order to give that security to others. We need to fill up so that we can give our gifts – wisdom, peace, love, joy, patience, kindness, gentleness, empathy, time, talent and treasures to others.
In order to be the woman that God created, we need to lean on Him first, then take the unique ways He made us and transfer His love to those around us.